A bit blurry but still discernible…
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You do know why the USAF is the most intelligent of all the services, don’t you, Matt?
Because we send our officers in to do the fighting, HA! 
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Retired Air Force here. As regular enlisted flight Crew, I always commented that where else on God’s green earth can anyone find a pilot (always an officer) that takes you from club to club!
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Being a mechanic, our humor was simple, sending new guys for exhaust samples, bolt stretchers, a box a grid squares, a prickE7 or my favorite the ID10T form.
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That reminds me (in our innocence in those far off days - we were only 15) of being sent to the Quartermasters for any of the following:
Glass nails
Rubber hammer (to strike the above with)
Striped paint
A long weight (which after a couple of hours had (obviously) metamorphosed into a “long wait”.
Sigh
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I had a young LT call me over to his HUMWV and ask what the cable under the steering wheel is for and I responded with “why to be able to pull start the truck in case the batteries died.” He tried for about 30 min before somebody else came to stop him.
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and not forgetting …
Tartan polish.
Keys to the indoor grenade range
keys to the indoor tank range …
there are a few others but I forget now…
The long weight one was always good for the new crow in the troop lol
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I once sent a solder to the supply room because they forgot to issue him his BA 11s. Sometimes I miss those days. But then I remember I’m retired laugh shake my head and go do what I want to do.
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I’d forgotten the “keys” genre; I remember some poor recruit being detailed off to draw the “Keys to the Square” from the guardroom, which sort of sounded historically plausible if you get what I mean viz some ancient tradition or similar. Of course, it was nothing of the sort and was usually followed by the Provost Sergeant’s ire exemplified by a bellow of “Stop wasting my effing time!” or “Getaway!”
What was unknown to us was that it was really some of the SNCOs winding one another up, obviously at our expense; I’m sure it was great sport (to them) but undertaken in deadly earnest by us(!)
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left handed screwdrivers/hammer/plyers/spanners or long stands/weights or tartan paint were all good items to send the numpties out for.
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Squelch Oil
Blinker Fluid
On any of those lists?
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Brass magnet
The expensive brass magnet
Lead magnet
BFA for anti tank weapons
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In the Mech unit motor pool have the new troops jump up and down on top of the track to check the shocks… give same said troops a hammer to check for weak spots in the armor…
Then send them to supply for a box of grid squares and M203 blank adapter…
In airborne units send the new trooper to supply for canopy lights and a bucket of prop wash… don’t forget a reel of flight line
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oh man I forgot about the soft spots we always had at least one vic covered in Xs and Os in soap stone.
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